turned 34 today

well today i turned 34 omg i cant believe i admitted that LOL! funny when i was in my 20's and didnt have boobs that look like a grandma skiing without a bra
i had all of this energy ,now i have none and when i say that i mean it !!!
i feel like i am destined for a rocking chair with a lap quilt
how did i suddenly become my mother ??!!!!! it's like i blinked and i now look like her act like her catch myself saying to my kids what she used to say to me
it's scary!!!!!where did my 1st 34 years go will i have 34 more i feel like i am just sitting watching my life fade away

i know that probably sounds crazy but man when did i grow up and not look at only tomorrow but the future also!!!!! i mean dont get me wrong i have always looked at the future but the future im talking about now is the futureeeeeeeee the one like 30 years away
i wonder what i will do when i no longer have kids hanging off of me and spit up on my shoulder 9 hundred loads of laundry a day it scares me to think of that
because it scares me to think my kids are what define me as a person
what kind of person am i going to be without my kids at home
charlie will be entering 9th grade soon and shania will be going into middle school next year it is all hitting me so hard the older i get